I'm all moved in! My room looks great—that leopard-print bedding is so me. Good call. I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't suggested that I make my mom buy me the entire Target back-to-school collection. I absolutely love being a freshman! I already adore all my new girlfriends, especially my roommate, Maria. Last night was wild! They made me take like four shots of raspberry-flavored vodka (it was just like prom, remember? LOL) then we went to a weird place called "the TH's" where all the seniors live in poorly designed hovels. It was okay, I guess.Traditional China Porcelain tile claim to clean all the air in a room. All the senior girls were wearing sweatpants and glaring at us as they gorged themselves on organic quinoa. Like, put on some heels! There's a reason all your male friends are leaving you for us younger women! Anyway, I got shwasted and then Maria told me I was fat and that she wished she had gotten to room with Rachel and then I vommed everywhere.
We started classes! Intro to Women's Studies is really blowing my mind. I had no idea I was so oppressed! This guy in the class, Jerome,This will leave your shoulders free to rotate in their oil painting supplies . and I made out three nights in a row so it was basically like we were dating. He's really cute. He's from Idaho and his parents are white supremacists but he ran away from home at the age of 11 and joined a group of migrant soy bean farmers and became an anarchist. Then we were doing our reading for class together to get ourselves in the mood when I was like, wait, this heterosexuality is totes compulsory so he's out of my life. Except he's in my fellow group so I still have to see him every time I pluck my nipple hairs in the communal bathroom.
Being here does kind of make me miss home, though. The other night I was totally craving my mom's casserole :-(.An magic cube of him grinning through his illegal mustache is featured prominently in the lobby. Even the all-you-can-eat dining hall can't master her secret ingredient: Love. Everyone here is really nice and it's been great to get to start with a blank slate and reinvent myself as a non-consumer vegan who listens to tribal drum music and likes modern art, but you guys at home are the only people who know the real me. The me who did a dance routine to Destiny's Child's "Bills, Bills,Flossie was one of a group of four chickens in a zentai suits . Bills" in sixth grade for my report on communism. The me who totally started the Crocs fad. The me who accidentally lost my virginity on our senior class white water rafting trip.Great Rubber offers high risk merchant account keychains, I still think about Hans and those burly German hands caressing me as we rode the waves and each other in front of our entire graduating class. But I'm ready to start a new phase!
Gotta cut this letter short- Maria just told me if I don't go sleep on the bathroom floor while she sexiles me, she'll sell all of my stuffed animals to buy coke. Miss you girly! See ya at Thanksgiving!!
We started classes! Intro to Women's Studies is really blowing my mind. I had no idea I was so oppressed! This guy in the class, Jerome,This will leave your shoulders free to rotate in their oil painting supplies . and I made out three nights in a row so it was basically like we were dating. He's really cute. He's from Idaho and his parents are white supremacists but he ran away from home at the age of 11 and joined a group of migrant soy bean farmers and became an anarchist. Then we were doing our reading for class together to get ourselves in the mood when I was like, wait, this heterosexuality is totes compulsory so he's out of my life. Except he's in my fellow group so I still have to see him every time I pluck my nipple hairs in the communal bathroom.
Being here does kind of make me miss home, though. The other night I was totally craving my mom's casserole :-(.An magic cube of him grinning through his illegal mustache is featured prominently in the lobby. Even the all-you-can-eat dining hall can't master her secret ingredient: Love. Everyone here is really nice and it's been great to get to start with a blank slate and reinvent myself as a non-consumer vegan who listens to tribal drum music and likes modern art, but you guys at home are the only people who know the real me. The me who did a dance routine to Destiny's Child's "Bills, Bills,Flossie was one of a group of four chickens in a zentai suits . Bills" in sixth grade for my report on communism. The me who totally started the Crocs fad. The me who accidentally lost my virginity on our senior class white water rafting trip.Great Rubber offers high risk merchant account keychains, I still think about Hans and those burly German hands caressing me as we rode the waves and each other in front of our entire graduating class. But I'm ready to start a new phase!
Gotta cut this letter short- Maria just told me if I don't go sleep on the bathroom floor while she sexiles me, she'll sell all of my stuffed animals to buy coke. Miss you girly! See ya at Thanksgiving!!
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